Phone Breathing

Today has been rather interesting. I spent my lunch break sitting in the sun, feeling the cool breeze remind me its winter. My puppy, who faces much adversity on a regular basis, seems to be recovering from his exploits well. Aside from wanting to play in the middle of the night and finding himself outside to sleep in his massive, shed-shapped doghouse, he has never seemed better. So the stress is off. I was just starting to enjoy such a nice friday when the worst of the worst happened.

Now to explain the situation fairly, let me give you a little run down on me. 1) I work in customer service. I love it. It gives my day purpose to have people needing my help or needing to understand something and being able to educate them. 2) One of my biggest pet peeves is being breathed on. There is just something about that closeness with someone that gently pokes and prods at me until I can do nothing but shriek in horror and squrim like a school girl being chased with a snake.

That being said, let me give you a run down of how this went. I was just sitting here, minding my own business. I must admit I snuck an extra doughnut from another floors party, but they didnt even notice the girl in the saggy pants running away with a doughnut, laughing victoriously. All in all I had done little to cause karma's angry hand on my baduccus. (Thats Kiki language for bum bum... erm... how do you say... buttocks. Yes yes) The phone rang (which is not the exciting part of this story, it always rings). HOWEVER! Before I could even suffer myself to say a single word, there it came, like an ominous call from my very nightmares...

Nothing was heard but the sound of the woman breathing ON THE PHONE! It was nothing but pure horror! I couldnt get away from it, I couldnt run screaming, I had to steel my nerves and speak to the woman as if she werent mimicing how much in my personal space she would be had she been face to face! Where is the phone etiquitte in the world?! Oh the madness! To make matters worse, she was a psychiatrist! I was mere moments away from breaking down, crying and begging her to fix the brain she had just melted with her inconsiderate phone-breathing.

Needless to say, it was traumatizing and I wish to never relive that memory again, but thankfully I made it out alive. Even better, I was able to overcome the stress so another personality was not needed to be created. Yay me!